I Love Tuesdays!

Almost every Tuesday I have my best friends B and R over for dinner and cocktails. They probably have no idea how much I look forward to it. B is in the first picture (he's the one on the left) with booger who attends a lot of our Tuesday evenings. R is in the second picture (on the right) with me. They are my brothers. Lord help anyone who tries to harm either of them. I LOVE YOU GUYS!

Yet Another Dream Squelched

From CNN:"The Church, while profoundly respecting the persons in question, cannot admit to the Seminary and to Holy Orders those who practice homosexuality, present deeply rooted homosexual tendencies or support the so-called gay culture," the document said.
But the document said when "homosexual tendencies are only the expression of a transitory problem ... these must be clearly overcome at least three years prior to diaconate ordination."
An estimate of the number of gays in U.S. seminaries and the priesthood range from 25 percent to 50 percent, according to a review of research by the Rev. Donald Cozzens, an author of "The Changing Face of the Priesthood."
Just when I hought I could realize my boyhood dream of becoming a priest, I find out that I would have to abstain from sex for three years. Not to mention covering up my "deeply rooted homosexual tendencies"! I think I would need a backhoe for that. If the Catholic Church doesn't want to encourage gays to enlist, then please stop releasing pictures of Sister Benedict in such fabulous frocks!

KITTY KITTY BANG BANG

And Now I Am Found

I am an admitted junkie of the television series "Lost". I love it! I just watched this last weeks show.

I realized that at any time in our lives that we may feel lost, we need to look forward and into our hearts, knowing that we will be found.

A Note From Batman

JUST READ THIS MSG YOU HAD SENT = THE POSTING BY AJ

I HAVE TO TELL YA = I AM VERY TAKEN BACK AT THE MOMENT. MY EYES ARE WATERING AND I HAD TO WIPE A TEAR OR TWO OFF MY CHEEK. MAYBE IT WAS WHAT YOUR POSTING SAID AND HOW IT WAS SAID THAT JUST RELATED ALL TOO WELL TO MY HEART. I DON'T KNOW AT THE MOMENT IF IT HELPS OR HURTS - PROBABLY BOTH.

BUT I AM SITTING HERE (FULL FROM DINNER AND SEVERAL AFTER DINNER DESSERTS) . I AM GONNA GO TAKE A WALK OR SOMETHING HERE.

I AM GLAD YOU CALLED TODAY.

...

He is a man with an open heart. God help us both!

With Gratitude and Appreciation

Once a year we gather our friends and family around us and give thanks for our blessings. On other occasions, we celebrate the same blessings, ie: Christmas, Hanukkah and milestones such as birthdays, weddings, domestic unions, even funerals. But even so, we tend to lose site of how much we truly value what should matter rather easily. Many times we realize just how precious something/someone is only when it/they are gone.

I try and be thankful every day. But I will be the first to admit that it is easy to let lifes battles and tribulations cloud my focus.

"Woe is me" is such an easy trap to find yourself bound within.

I am so fortunate. I was blessed with a family that loves me unconditionally. My Mother and older brother have passed, but I know they are with me, loving me as they did while they were here. My Father, three sisters and younger brother may be two thousand miles away but I keep them very close to my heart. I know they love me and they know I love them.

If that weren't enough, the Universe has given me some wonderful friends. They are my family too. They are the ones that I am able to share all the shit that comes with living day to day. They are also the first ones I call when something good presents itself to me. They put up with me being a story teller, teller, teller. When I go on incessantly about a new experience or person in my life, they just smile and are happy for me. I am able to cry and laugh with them. Most often, because of my nature, both at the same time. I have been accused of being too focused on my friends. What a short-sighted, selfish way to look at true love. Guilty as charged!

If it were possible to list all of them here, I would. They know that I love them.

I hope and pray that my gratitude and appreciation will always be the beat that keeps me dancing through this life.

Please, tell the people in your life how much you love and appreciate them. Not only will it make them feel as special as they should but it will enrich your soul.

Thank you TC and Hans!

Last night I was honored to be a guest at my good friends' home for a small dinner party. The Holidays have officially started! The picture above doesn't quite capture how beautiful their home looked, but I believe it does show the warmth that I felt.

FIVE HUNDRED TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED MINUTES

How do you measure the life of a woman or a man?

I have been anticipating the opening of this movie for quite some time. I saw the stage production in three different cities: Chicago, San Francisco, and Davis, Ca (Yes, Davis, Ca). Today it opens and I will see it tonight. It's a very warm, uplifting story.

Jonathan Larson wasn't completely finished with it when he died suddenly while the show was in previews. Apparently, Chris Columbus studied Larson's notes and interviewed the original cast members and took the movie in the direction he felt Larson was headed.

Grab a good friend, give them a big hug, and take them to see this show! NO DAY LIKE TODAY!

Not as Angry...

As my last post. Phyl, Brenda, and I had a good time in SF Saturday night. It was good seeing Phyl relax and have a good time. It's been a long several days...

On a completely other note, ran into the ex while in SF. He had somebody with him, yipppeee! It was a good meeting. Nice guy. Kind of funny, Phyl and Bren have known him for a long time...

Mary

R.I.P. or Now I Am Really Fucking Angry!!!

If you happen to scroll down, you will read my concern about a friend who hadn't been heard from. Barely five minutes after that post I was driving in my car thinking that the day was starting to turn. Then my phone rang. My friend is dead.

I met Gerald probably about a year and a half ago. He is my dear friends best friend. He had came to Northern California for a visit and I'm sure also to check on our mutual friend. G was this huge six foot four black man with a shaved head and goatee. With his over-powering physical stature came this in your face wit that I truly appreciated. What was even more appealing was his warm smile and tremendous heart.

When I heard that he would be visiting again, I told R to let him know he was more than welcome to crash on my couch. R said that there was no way G would want to do that. Guess what, he accepted the offer and I have been grateful for that ever since. I got to know G more and understood why he and R had such a great friendship.

R is the biggest and sweetest teddy bear of a man. It is no surprise to me that when they met in Seattle there was a bond immediately. I love R, he is my brother. After G left, we would e-mail and talk on the phone about our mutual love and concern for R. G appreciated what I saw in R and how I felt.

We also shared the same opinion about others.

I AM SO FUCKING PISSED. AIDS IS NOT GONE PEOPLE. WHAT PISSES ME OFF EVEN MORE IS THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE G THAT THINK THEY ARE FEELING WELL SO THEY DON'T MONITOR THEIR NUMBERS.

JUST AS UPSETTING ARE THE COUNTLESS YOUNG PEOPLE THAT THINK THAT AIDS AND HIV ARE SOMETHING THE OLDER GENERATION EXPERIENCED. I'VE GOT NEWS FOR THEM: IT HASN'T GONE ANYWHERE! IT IS JUST LAYING LOW, ADAPTING TO WHATEVER ANTI-BIOTICS WE THROW AT IT. UNTIL WE FIND A TRUE CURE, IT IS OUT THERE WAITING, GATHERING YET MORE STRENGTH. I do not want to see it swallow another generation. We are fortunate in The States. In Africa there has been no reprise. But, they are poor so apparently that's OK...

To Gerald: Thank you, you enlightened me, made me laugh and shared the love of a good friend. I know you are taking care of R from that side. I just want you to know that I am hanging on to him tightly from this side. Peace, Love and Comfort...

Today is a test in strength...

It was bad enough to begin my day with a mouth that is just falling apart. To make matters worse, people at work are fucking clueless idiots. Just because I know how to figure something out, or find the answer to a question, does not mean my time should be compromised. I left work after only being there for an hour and a half. I needed to decompress.

After I had been home for about thirty minutes my doorbell rang. It was the owner of the apartment building in which I live. He asked if he could show a friend of his my unit (in my mood today I am not even going to touch that one). I allowed him to. On their way out the owner asked me not to tell anyone, ie: other tenants, building manager. Only one thing can come from this - Building sold, rent increased. Damn, any of you living in California already know we are paying too much!

After that wonderful surprise I hit the road to see some customers. What do you know, that actually put me in a better space.

My troubles are small. A friend of mine is ill and no one can seem to reach him. I hope that he is just retreating and laying low, and will soon return the phone messages and e-mails myself and others have sent. GET WELL "G" AND CALL!

Boy, that really puts everything in perspective, life isn't easy but I don't recall anyone telling me it would be...

Wishing everyone a happy day.

What do I do?

I have known for quite some time that I have gum disease. I have no dental insurance and haven't for some time.

I have this unnatural fear of dentists. It's odd, it just began a few years ago. To make matters worse, the last one I went to had this very sadistic technician. I had explained to them my fear. They still set me in a room next to where she was working and talking about how she WAS sadistic. I allowed her to work on me, but she was way too rough. The next time I was there I told them that there was no way I would allow her near my mouth. They gave me another technician who was great. The next time I was there they tried to send Nurse Ratchet in again. I fumed and told them they had better finally do their job and put it in my file that she was not allowed to work on me... I never went back and haven't seen a dentist since. It has been about three years. I have never had a cavity, but without gums, that does me no good.

In my last relationship, my "partner" had assured me that I had insurance. I told him to get me the card that I needed to see a Dr. He said none was needed. I didn't believe it. He used to try and control me through my lack of money. Even with insurance, there is a great deal of money needed for the care that I need.

As my relationship was ending, I checked into the dental insurance plan he said I was enrolled in. Sure enough, they had never heard of me. Fucker! What the hell was I going to do with a hefty dental bill. Be forced to stay with him? I don't think so.

I have tried to care for my teeth as well as I can. Unfortunately, in the last few weeks my gums have receded dramatically. My mouth hurts! I wake up with blood in my mouth. I don't know what to do. I have enrolled in a dental plan, but that could take weeks before I get care.

Even with the insurance, I am going to be in debt several hundred dollars if I am lucky enough to keep my teeth. If they have to go, or begin falling out, as I fear, I will owe thousands of dollars.

I am in Sales. Who the fuck wants to buy anything from some toothless freak? On a more personal note, I have just began getting to know someone wonderful. What is he going to think if the next time I see him I look like my worst fear?

Sometimes I hate being all alone in this world.

Another Alien Sighting in Northern Ca... Or too much Vodka???

I just had this IM exchange with my good buddy who was over last night:

r: GM!
aj: OMG, HE LIVES!
r: lol
r: how did I get home?
aj: Aliens
r: ehehehehe
aj: I tried to stop them, but when they mentioned probing you, you wouldn't let me...
r: oh too funny
aj: They were hot, if you like 3 feet tall, big dicked green things with three eyes.
r: no really I don't remember
aj: That's what many people say after being abducted by them, although you went willingly... WHORE!
r: ok ok
r: no really, how did I get home?
aj: Robbie, I told you. We heard a loud humming noise out in the parking lot and investigated. I was scared of the hung, little fuckers, but you went running into their laps!

Penis, Dick, Schlong, Mr. Happy, Member...

I have a literary (I am using the term loosely) project which I am working on and could use some help. Part of this project discusses the many different names men have called their penis. If you are male and reading this, please send me a list of your favorite names for your dick. If you are female, please only send me names that you have heard men use referring to their member (Do not include names you and your girlfriends have used).

More on "The Dick Diatribes" later.

Thank you in advance. AJ

BATMAN Strikes, but Palm Springs is no Gotham!

What a weekend! I hardly feel worthy. As planned, I rendezvoused with Batman in Palm Springs early Friday evening. It was so good to see him again and hear his laugh, as well as some of the stories he has relayed to me in IM's and e-mails.

Friday night we relaxed for a few hours until his friends from OC arrived. I had been pretty anxious to meet them (P & M). Fortunately, they were two of the nicest and more interesting people I have ever met. If you can truly judge a person by the company they keep, Batman is GOLD.

After they got caught up, J (Batman) and I went to The Barracks and The Tool Shed for a few beers. The latter was definitely the place to be on Friday night.

Saturday we relaxed even more (Thank God). Then in the afternoon we went to the leather mart and visited most of the gay shops which are peppered all over PS. It was very nice just spending time and getting to know J more. He is an extremely kind, generous and very funny individual. That night there was more relaxation around the hot tub. Later, around midnight, we went to the bar called Heaven. Not a very large crowd and the dj didn't seem to know how to keep the tempo up. P went with us and had never experienced a "Dance" party before. The three of us had a great time. We left a little before four and headed right back for the hot tub.

Because I am cursed with not being able to sleep in, EVER, I woke early. J slept in very late. This gave me more time with P & M. Mid-afternoon we were ready to go to the beer bust at The Barracks. J and I only had one beer before heading back to the house for some more fun! Oh yeah, I haven't even mentioned all the wild, uninhibited sex we had all weekend...Nuff said?

Needless to say, Gotham was free of drama, Batman definitely seemed to have looked forward to our seeing each other again as I had, and there were no villains in site...BATMAN FOREVER? Well, it is still way too early for that, but some day we could definitely be quite the DYNAMIC DUO!

J has bought a house in PS and plans to live there more than 50% of the time. This would be good for "us" because he currently lives in FL. He, as well as P & M told me that I am welcome there ANY time. It is a beautiful, fun town.

NEXT EPISODE: It seems as though BATMAN and AJ will not be reunited until the end of January when we meet in Miami and board a huge boat full of fags! I CAN"T WAIT.

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

The People have spoken Mr. Governor.

Just another "GirlieMan"

Who can turn the world on with her smile?

What a beautiful Fall day! After taking my jog through an autumn colored Minneapolis park and tossing my hat about, I decided I should see what Phyllis was up to. She was online and up for a cocktail, so I invited her over. While I was waiting for her I realized that Ida had left me a message. So I called her and invited her over too. Ida has a prescription for medicinal marijuana and tends to think that it is a remedy for everything. I tend to agree. Needless to say, the cocktails, weed and good friends capped off a very nice weekend...Mary

BATMAN RETURNS

As I mentioned in my post "DST" I am going to see "Batman" in Palm Springs this coming Friday! I have been looking forward to it for weeks.

BATMAN BEGINS: At the beginning of this year, I knew that I wanted to have a lot of fun with my new found single life. It occurred to me that celebrating my birthday at International Mr. Leather (IML) would be one way to achieve this. A few months before going, I met this stud on-line. We were both in a Chicago chat room checking things out. We talked a few times before exchanging phone numbers and decided to meet while there.

It turned out that we are both originally from Illinois (the "S" is silent, ok people!). He was also visiting family for several days before ending his vacation at IML. After visiting with my family, I called him as I was getting closer to Chicago. He was sitting one hundred yards behind me in the same traffic jam.

When we finally met in his room, we were both quite pleased. We "played" for a few hours. I saw him later that night at the dance at The House of Blues. Later that evening I gave him a booty call and he came to my room promptly. We did get to see each other the next night at another dance. Then I even bumped into him again as he was leaving the hotel.

We have kept in touch. A few months after Chicago, he told me that I reminded him of "Robin" from the Batman movie. I asked him how he looked in a Batsuit...

Finally, I was going to see him again. He invited me to meet him in San Francisco for FOLSOM STREET FAIR. Originally, I planned on changing in a bathroom in the lobby and arriving at the hotel room wearing my costume that is at the bottom of this page. When my friend pulled up to the hotel, Batman was outside! HOLY WRENCH IN THE PLANS! I mentioned to him that I had had this surprise involving a costume and he turned very red and didn't want to hear anything about my plan. I decided it was best to drop the subject and make sure we got off to a good start! As we did! We had a GREAT time! A lot of great sex, good conversation, hot dancing, beautiful weather, and more good sex!

After I returned home, I ended up having my good buddy "TC" take a picture of me in the costume. I framed it, wrapped it in bubble wrap, tied the mask around that, placed it along with a black leather rose in a box and sent it to him in Florida. It arrived the day before his birthday. SCORE! He seemed very happy with the surprise, once he stopped laughing that is... The following day, on his birthday, a card and flowers arrived at his house.

It just so happens that it will be Leather Weekend in PS while we are there. I expect it to be a more low-key than our previous meetings. I really enjoyed getting to know more about him face-to-face in SF and anticipate more of that. But this time he will have some of his friends there... AJ = NERVOUS!

We talk quite a bit. Mostly e-mails and IM's. I am still trying to figure out if it is the distance that I find comfort in... But I do know, I really like him quite a bit.

STAY TUNED: Will Gay Gotham be free of drama? Does Batman look forward to this as much as Robin? Will The Riddler, Penguin, or Mr. Freeze cause problems? Will there be a BATMAN FOREVER ? (Way too early for that!)

Vote NO!

Not Your Grandmother's Couch...

OK, I have a purple couch, why does that seem so strange to some people? It's very comfortable and I have probably logged almost as much sleep on it as I have my bed since it arrived. I know it has definitely seen a lot more action than my bed... I have one friend who has threatened to stain it!
The only reason I bring up "purple" is because when I returned home last night I noticed the cushions a little dissheveled. I knew nobody had been here. I investigated and in the corner under the cushions was a pair of heavy-duty tit clamps. I say "heavy duty" because they are! There is a chain linking them together with something hanging from the middle of the chain that I can only imagine is for weighting purposes...
More invesitgation needed. The last dude here was also named AJ! I believe they may be his... He was very hot and I would be more than happy to work his tits over for him! I'll keep you updated.